July 6 2013…. it was 6:00am i heard a faint knock on the door but me being a lazy human being shrugged to my fiance to go open the door and see what they wanted. I continued to go to sleep couple minutes later he comes in and tells me its my sister and she wants to talk to me.. so i get up and go to her room and see that she is crying. i stand there and watch her in silence just waiting for her to tell me when she is ready what is wrong. she finally tells me i heard her but i didnt want to accept it its like the world around me just shut down and all i can hear is this ringing in my ear. i was thinking okay im sleepy i probably heard wrong. then she tells me to call my other sister. so then im like shit this is true my dad did in fact die… i didnt know how to respond. i hadnt seen him in like 10 years. i just stood there trying to comfort my sister… i went on lived life went to school , got engaged, had a child and got a job.its almost been a year since he died. and just today it hit me that my dad died. i broke down crying in the shower just sat down in tears having all these memories of him. my dad just died…it took me an entire year pretty much to let it sink in… i loved him more than anything and he will never know my kids. when i get married he wont be the one to walk me down the isle. I went an entire year pretending i was fine. letting people judge me thinking they know my life when in fact they dont know anything about me just what i want people to see. i sat in the shower today crying missing my father who even though wasnt like most dads he was still MY dad. i loved him no matter his flaws. and i will never get to let him know that. and thats what kills me the most. 

LSD to scientist is like steroids for athletes if you think about it. Most great scientist have had awesome ideas while on LSD